I found myself pulled over on the side of the road this morning just so I could get a closer look at a Canadian goose and her babies. I was mesmerized with the beauty of their simplicity, just standing in a field eating and spending time together. When I peered into my rear view mirror to check the traffic I noticed I had a huge grin on my face. I liked seeing myself smile. I also realized at that moment that I need to smile more often. I am always taking in and appreciating events, and moments, I do smile.... but not nearly often enough. Yes I smile when I hear something funny, and I do laugh a lot but I am referring to smiling, for no reason.
My children make me happy; Melissa in particular makes me smile often. Thoughts of her easily bring me to a complete state of joy and happiness. Her spirit is the kindest and most heartfelt out of everyone I know. I find myself thinking of her and her antics when I am feeling low; it is a guaranteed “pick me up.” For me it is all about the small stuff in life that makes me happy or smile. Romantic Dinners, gifts, flowers....do nothing for me. Honestly my ideal night... being allowed to sit quietly by the water staring out into the endless horizon and not being asked “can we go now?” Wow. That makes me smile.
It is hard sometimes to want to smile or find joy in our life, as things can be so tough at times. It is not just about illness, it is about everyday stuff that happens to us and inadvertently causes us to grieve. There will come a day in our lives that we will have to lay to rest someone we love, be it a parent, a sibling, a friend or worse one of our children. There may come a day when your spouse will sit you down and tell you that they don’t love you anymore. You may have to deal with an abusive spouse, or find out that your spouse cheated on you ...or you find yourself cheating. You may lose your job, or your home. You may even have to deal with a family member that is a drug/alcohol abuser. Despite all of the shitty things that happen to people every single day, we are still expected to live a normal law abiding good citizen life style. They will still be expected to be a parent, a spouse, a sibling even if they don’t have the mental energy to do so.
I have learned that life is very difficult and I also know that not one person reading this post has not had to deal with something in their life that has been traumatic or extremely difficult. So what does this blog about smiling have to anything to do with the hardships in life? EVERYTHING! Smiling is the fuel we feed our soul to motor us through the shit times... Taking in the things you like and relishing in on the joy it brings you is what should matter to you.
The small things like Easter morning, a birthday, a camping trip, a passer by saying hello...these are the small things in life that help us get through our grief. Collections of small memories or thoughts are banked in our minds, it transforms as positive energy when we need it the most. So I look at it like this, good times to be had are simply an emotional investment for when the world around us feels like it is falling apart. What else could possibly get us through some of the horrific things we have to endure? It is absolutely everything that happens in our lives between the crap piles; the many incredible yet small things. For me it’s Melissa and her open minded way of living, her zest and hunger for the things that make her love life. It’s Ashley and her incredible strength and determination to succeed that makes me smile, and Samantha’s unwavering dedication to live each and every moment to the fullest. It is also the small things in my life like connecting to complete strangers in stores, or on the internet. Watching a toddler trying to walk, or seeing my buddy’s dog go crazy with excitement when he sees me.... watching a young couple walking together hand in hand. You get the picture.......
Recently I was told by a very special person in my life that I was strong, and yet I don’t see that about myself. I guess I am used to jumping hurdles and facing hardship, what I can tell you is that I absorb every opportunity to please myself. That does not imply monetary items; it simply means I look at things with an open mind and heart. I look for things to smile about, even if no one else is around. I had to really stop and think about what would give someone else the impression that I am strong, and so I realized that I am just relying on the times I had that weren’t horrible. I also make a conscientious effort to reinvest on my emotional front. “Stop and smell the roses” so to speak. I am much more aware now of the positivity that surrounds us every day and I refuse to take all the wonderful little blessings in our lives for granted. It is not because life is too short....It is because life is too long to be unhappy and without smiles.
~Christine~
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