Happiness & Disbelief

I got to thinking yesterday after I had posted a comment on friends wall…that I am a very lucky girl. I read back the words that I had written and then read the comment that she had written back; I realized that I am very blessed. Her excitement kind of shook me as she seemed much happier about my post than I was. I guess I have been in a state of mind for so long that I have forgotten how to be anything other than an ill person.

For the past 10 years cancer has been a major thing in our life and yet it has never stopped us from living. It has created many hardships for our family but for some reason and somehow we as a unit have never allowed it to tear us down or apart. We have just sort of grown accustomed to it. Maybe we never really dealt with it; who knows. I know that I have feared dying and that my family has feared losing me, but has anyone ever really doubted that I could beat it? It is not about denial or well wishing. I really think that my family thinks I can overcome anything. They know I am a fighter but they must think that I am a champion fighter because after some discussions with them this past weekend…no one really believed that I would succumb to it. I can’t say that so lightly myself. I have feared dying as I know you can only cheat death so many times…..but to be honest with you this last round had me convinced that I was not to survive, so much so that I did things that prepared me for death.

I went to great lengths in fact to make sure that I was ready to meet my maker; as well, I made sure that my funeral was prepared so that my family would not have had to deal with it. I made amends with individuals that I never thought was possible and even found the strength to close some doors on people who I accept …will never have the pleasure in seeing me again. I know my journey was not a waste because I am happy with the choices I made; as I feel lighter so to speak. I can smile without the same pain level that I once had knowing the loose ends in my life needed to be tied are now done.

This weekend I made a comment on a friend’s facebook wall, as I mentioned earlier…that was the spark to my fire of happiness. I was joking about a liver cleanse that she was promoting. I mentioned I too did the cleanse- mine was called RE-Section…lol, of course the comments went back and forth but it wasn’t until I mentioned that my liver had already rejuvenated to its rightful size …..well she responded in such a way  that I found myself crying. I cried so hard in fact it hurt my side. I am healed. It hit me that for the first time in 10 years I don’t have cancer…. Again my tears are pouring from my eyes. I have said it, but truth be told I have mechanically spoke about my cancer for so long that I am continuing to do it even in remission. Oh joy is me…..I will say it again. I am cancer free. I weep with such joy…

Pat loves me immensely…so I figured that since we arrived in London that he was holding me out of fear of me leaving him and so now that we are home I wondered why he has continued in such the same manners…… he has just been so thankful ….well anyways now I understand all the selfies he wants to take with me, and why he wants to hold and kiss me so often. I am cancer free; the bricks have fallen off his shoulders and this is his way of celebrating. I feel like a soldier who has just returned from battle….even have the scars to prove it! ( Don’t worry mom I won’t post anymore of my half naked body pictures too prove it; although I must say I am hot)

I guess there is some getting used to around here when it comes to speaking about my illness. The “have” and the “had” word will have to be reversed when speaking of my illness. 10 long years of this …is enough. Again I am weeping. I guess today being 4 weeks post-surgery it is finally hitting me. I am so very happy; actually happy is not a word that describes how I feel. Relieved is the first word to describe but then after that …there are no words to describe truly how I feel, there simply can’t be a word to explain or to justify the wealth of emotion that I feel. Bitterness and anger no longer run through me… it is in the past and besides I have learned so much about myself, my family and others and would have never taken this journey had it not been for cancer. I have no regrets. Cancer has been a blessing just as much as it has been my enemy.

Cancer is not my testimony in life…my battle with it has been. My attitude towards my illness is what has gotten me to today…cancer free. I have never ever once allowed my illness to be a crutch and nor have I ever allowed it to define me or my limitations. It has not won one ounce of me or my body. Yeah I am a few organs short the next guy……but I obviously don’t need them anyways! Ha ha ha.

Today it is rainy, tomorrow it is supposed to snow…..horrible weather right? You won’t hear a negative word out of this mouth; a day for me is a day alive. THAT is where my joy and my happiness will come from. I am in disbelief even thinking of being able to say “cancer free”….wow. Thank you to all of you who support me, and for never ever letting me think that I could not take this beast on. Your belief in my ability to live through this amazes me. I am a goose who is finally able to set sail…you are my wind behind my stretched out wings. I humbly and so graciously thank you. AND you are right Nancy we must and we will celebrate this......

Love

~Christine~

Here are 2 very important pictures to share. Pat & I when I started this journey, and yesterday. Patrick….I LOVE YOU 

2004

2014

(cancer free smiles)

What to Share & With Who...

First let me tell you that once again kindness has struck...as I was about to go out for my "Teddy Bear Tea Time" a car pulled into the driveway. A young man in a beat up white car was struggling to carry out of the back seat a wealth of takeout food.I opened the front door and yelled "you have the wrong house we didn't order anything"... he confirmed the address and said it was prepaid and was being sent to our family. I stood in awe at the wealth of food that was being delivered to my home; more over I was overwhelmed that someone yet again stopped to think of our family in such a touching way. The blessings just seem to keep coming. Thank you for the delicious dinner. Obviously you know me well to know what food to send... and you knew my address (lol). So Thank you.

To share, what to share and when to share is the topic today; which is fitting considering last night I found myself sitting with a great friend having tea and "sharing". There are very few people that I can say that I am still willing to share my life with. Not that I am cutting individuals out but what I mean is; have real conversations with. Sharing is exhausting and it is a difficult thing to do these days. 

I am a firm believer in sharing with others; I always say this....but what I have learned is that not everyone is deserving of hearing your story. Now I know I share a lot of things on my blog that many may find too intimate, but trust me I have a whole wealth of things that I will take to my grave.... just know that what I will take with me are not just my own experiences but also the stories and testimonies others have shared with me. I am that person you can talk to without first having to say "please don't tell anyone". I value what others share with me...immensely.

I have always considered it to be an honour that someone would want to share their deepest darkest secrets with me. The way I look at it is this....every single time you share a story, a feeling or a fear with another person you have just given them a piece of you; of which can never be taken or given back. For the individuals that are trust worthy with information that is an incredible thing......however there are those out there that may seem sincere with hearing your words but as soon as you leave; your story becomes theirs to tell re-tell AND re-tell in any way they seem fit.

Sharing takes courage! But it also takes wisdom... to know who, with and what to share. We have all been burned at one point in time by another person and their ill conceived notion of what a friend is or should be. There are very few people that I can let my entire load off onto; in fact several people carry each a small load. I once made the mistake of being naive no.....stupid in that I believed another person was as genuine as myself when it came time to opening up and being vulnerable about life. (See right there is proof I am getting wise, because never again will I allow myself to do this with anyone other than my spouse) This individual tried to destroy me; tried. She also shared many details of her journey that I am certain she would not want others to know but the difference between us is this. When the toxic friendship ended she believed that I was like her in that the information I "had on her" would be shared with others, so she beat me to the punch. Although I could have caused a lot of havoc in her life I choose to remember that once information is given to me ....it stays there even when I want to be vengeful.... I can't. Even though I hate, despise, loathe this woman I will not reveal a thing about her. (although some vodka has brought me very close a few times)

I feel sorry for her as much as I hate her for what she did to me (sounds dramatic eh?) I am certain each of you reading this has been betrayed by someone at some point in your life, and maybe not by them sharing personal stuff about you but anytime another person you once had trust for crosses the security boundary it changes us...it hardens us and in some cases if we learn from it it makes us wise :) Btw there is no expiry date on information...just because you stop talking to a person for a long period of time does not mean that you can tell others what they once shared in confidence with you. So be prepared to hear and forget how to repeat. Even though relationships end that does not mean that the trust you once had for and from the other person ever ends. If you can't guarantee another person that you are unable to do so; change the conversation....

Back to the sharing aspect of relationships. Like I have said before it is important to share with others as we all benefit from hearing the journey others have taken as we learn coping strategies. I am thinking that my struggles are my testimony in life and that I am supposed to share with others so that others perhaps will not have to learn the hard way. This holds true for many experiences that I have had but the difference between sharing and confiding are huge. I think we fail to understand the difference in the two. I share with you for your benefit and you share with me because it is cathartic and because you need to lessen your load....

Confiding in another person is a really big deal. You have to really think it through before you decide to share. Once you speak the words...it is gone and unfortunately words are intangible so no going by later that night to pick them back up.... and once you have shared, a small piece of you is gone. That other person now owns a wee little bit of you. Scary thought eh? Now not everyone you share with will try to destroy you....or stalk you ...(LOL)but is that person someone you really want to know your inner self to that degree? Sometimes we know the person we are about to share with perhaps is not the best choice but we do anyway because maybe our pain level is high that day and we just need to open up and rid some pressure. I get that, but when the person you are with says " I shouldn't tell you this but " ....the light switch should go off boys and girls .....because  perhaps their next Timmie's date with another friend can and will be "I shouldn't tell you this but".

Try this the next time someone says that to you. Stop them dead in their tracks and say "no you shouldn't tell me, would you tell someone else something I have asked you not to?" Now I know that you will probably embarrass them but... you are setting the ground rules as to what type of conversation is to be had with that individual and you are also letting them now that you are not the kind of person that talks "shit" about others. We all need to do this and do it more often...easier said then done...why? We are all guilty of wanting to hear about others and their hard ships. What is that word for it? oh right GOSSIP... ha ha It is also because like I talked about yesterday we all struggle with our own self esteem and worth and because of that we need to constantly measure ourselves by measuring others. If she has dark secrets and her husband cheated on her ..it is like "phew... that is horrible...well at least that didn't happen to me so my life is better, I must be better and so I am good".... Not "oh no the poor girl I wish I could do something to help her through it". Nope, human nature is to relish in others pain and hardship...grrrr

Don't give the wrong people the right ammunition to use against you. Be wise with your judgement of others. Also be wise about you and what you are willing to give others. Telling the wrong people your genuine pain is like typing your problems onto the internet.....it will go viral.Share with others just don't give more than you can afford to lose. Be wise in what you are telling others; moreover who you are telling. ALSO be that person who hears and forgets the information. Don't break confidence; respect the commitment you made to not share. Most importantly don't listen to what others have to say after they utter "I shouldn't tell you this but...". Make people accountable; if you don't who will? Don't be afraid to share with others as  it is important to have dialogue just learn how to trust that inner voice that is telling you what and who to share with, you already know .....

Love

~Christine~

Why You Should Always be YOU

Have you ever looked into the mirror and fell in love with the person you see? I am not talking about how you look at one particular time for a specific event...I mean you; just the way you are...your beautiful one of a kind self. Do you really believe that there is not one single soul on this planet that is exactly like you? My children are often told that they look like me or that in some ways they behave like me; they obviously roll their eyes....but I remind them that they in some ways are "like" me but no one other person is me. I am Christine. They are just them. I am certain that many of my friends and family members are certainly thankful that there is no other Christine traumatizing the planet like I do, but I find comfort knowing that I am unique and precious just because of this very fact. Despite the fact that for most of my "growing years" my father wished and threatened upon me "when you grow up I hope you have a kid just like you"...ha ha.....close dad; they are a lot like me but no one is me; just me.

Being Christine is not a special event or circumstance that others need be jealous of, or envious of; as I am just me. There is nothing about me that stands out to the majority; but to my small circle of loved ones I am a celebrity. They love and adore me. That makes me wealthy. But not only does it make me a rich woman because they love me but because I love me as well. Now I haven't always loved myself, in fact I am just starting to realize the reasons I should love me; one reason for certain is that I am the only one just like me. God created me then broke the mold; as he did the same with you. We have been given a life and a story that dictates the "who" we are, and since no other person has experienced what you have; how can we ever be like another human being? I am certain that even identical twins have an increased amount of similarities and common character traits but are completely and utterly unique to one another.

 We spend so much time in our lives trying to fit in and be like others. We measure our worth and lives by all the wrong measuring sticks created by others. I know that I have wasted a great deal of time trying to be something that others will love and respect all the while selling myself short of who I really am. Yes there are times in our lives that we should gain particular traits from others and learn from other women or men as to "how to live" our lives better, but we shouldn't never try to be so much like some one else that we lose ourselves in "being "that other person. Besides there really can't be that much fun in being someone other than yourself; where is the joy in that? I am 43 years old, I run my own household, I have my own children and I still at times look outside of my own shell to see if there is something better out there for me; better than me. I read articles, books, quotes and blogs on a daily basis all in hopes of discovering a better way of being me. It all comes down to .....be me. Duh. I am the best gauge of where I need to be, and who I need to be.

I am not the most beautiful woman in the world and nor am I am the ugliest. I don't have a perfect body; but it is perfectly mine. I am not always funny; but I make myself laugh. I am not always the smartest person but I am willing to accept what I don't know and learn. I am not the best friend that everyone needs but I know that if you are my friend I love you and would do anything for you. I am not afraid of being by myself any longer; I am content with my own company. That comes from being settled inside and no longer fearing the effects of bad choices. 

I wonder how many years we waste trying to figure out how to change ourselves...when will we be just perfect, the way we are. Yes, yes there is a need to always change, adapt and re-invent yourself but I am talking about the very premise of you just being you; because you are YOU. I love the saying "be yourself everyone else is already taken."

Celebrate, spoil, and love yourself. If you don't who else will? Don't be afraid of who you are, embrace the unique person that you are and for God's sake stop worrying what others think of you. If people judge you it is only because they have no idea who they are and are using you as a measuring stick to gauge where they are. Feel sorry for them; not yourself, because you already know that you are beautiful, intelligent, unique and one of a kind.....and you are the very best at being you. 

I never thought the day would come that I would stand in front of my own mirror and smile. I am accepting of the woman I am and look at my "battle wounds" and know that not one other person on this planet has experienced what I have, nor has another person made me who I am today. I have been influenced by others but at the end of the day I am me because of me, and I love me today because I am the one and only me. Ha ha thank Heavens for Pat that there is not 2 of me.....Have a great day being you!

Love

~Christine~ 

Rainy Day Smiles

Rainy days make me smile; it forces me to feel like cleaning my house and look through old photos. Pretty much every time it rains I whip out literally 1000's of pictures and relish in the memories of what I have captured. Rainy days also cause me to feel like looking back not only through photos but on my life as well. I am 43 years old but feel like I have lived twice this so far...I am not sure if it has been the hardships or the illnesses that have aged me, but either way I feel much wiser because of it. I am not being arrogant by saying that I am wise but in comparison to where I have been in my past; I am much wiser.

Days like today I feel like preaching to a mass group of people; young people. I want to share the ropes and tales of what to do and what not to do. I feel like my mistakes and wrong turns will be forgiven in my own mind if I can reach at least one person who listens and does not take some of the paths I have taken. 

The pictures are wonderful reminders of great times spent with family but also serve as a point of reference as to when I started to mature and earn my grey hair and stretch marks; you know, when I became a woman.....

The times I recall when I was sick with worry and filled with stress I wonder if there would have been a different outcome had I had the ability to just stop and breathe before acting on my stressful thoughts. I know that even today I get stressed out with worry about my future and the future of my daughters but for some reason I don't let those thoughts become desperate. I simply know that things will work out; because history has taught that to me.

I truly believe that there is not one thing in this lifetime that is ever too big for any one of us; not one thing. Every thing that breaks can be fixed; even if it gets re-invented into something else... Wisdom is one the greatest powers an individual can acquire. I am not quite where I want to be in the "wisdom" department as of yet....but feel that I am well on my way. How can I tell? Well.... I don't do the same things I once did and I hesitate before I leap. I am no longer blind to the realities of what others can and WILL do to you and against you. I also no longer leap to help others, I have established the 24 hour rule into my life. I simply wait and see how I feel after a full day before any major decision is made in my life or that of anothers.

My little dog Sara and I curled up on the couch today in my blankie. I know my dog is wise. She is 14 and has the patience and grace of an elderly woman. She never gets too excited and never ever forgets to acknowledge someone who comes in the door. She knows when I am not well as she never leaves my side despite her own ailments. She is blind in one eye and can barely do stairs and yet she runs them up and down to be able to just stand beside me in support. She has never growled at or bitten any one or anything. She has taken a lot of lumps graciously.....I know she is a wise old dog and I envy where she is. I only wish for one day she could speak. The conversation would only be about wisdom as I believe she is a capsule full of it. 

Things are looking up as I am starting to feel a bit better, I even went to church yesterday and did the lap of testimony that I threatened everyone with ! hahah I did it. I walked around the entire church during praise /choir time so that everyone could see that I was out of the hospital and well....not dead. lol

Funny thing is...while I was in church yesterday I thought maybe I was being spoken to directly; as everything I seem to be facing was of topic. I felt redeemed of my stress and worry and was reminded that I have wisdom, and it is true I already know what to do but I guess somehow it was good to have that confirmation. I am a woman that can be asked advice from, for many different aspects of life. I guess my struggles are my testimonies. The difficulties broke me so that I could repair to me; now. "sometimes good things fall apart so that better things can fall together". God's honest truth. My weaknesses are my strengths especially if I am able to share them with others in the attempt to change someone else's life. We are never ever meant to go through life on our own...we must always have a support system always.....especially a wise older person on our side. 

Btw just because a person is old does not make them wise.... so I guess you can be wise at any age it just depends on what you have experienced and how you have learned from it. Wisdom is being able to share those lessons in a way that serves a purpose to another human being , not just a regurgitation of a story with no good resolve. So maybe just maybe I am wise?? Hoot  Hoot ...lol

 Love 

~Christine~

The Road to Recovery

Just wondering like most days since I have been out of the hospital if I in fact took the wrong road map.... this road that I am currently on seems to be taking far too many detours. I mean I can handle the things that have been happening to me but I am starting to lose my "positive perspective". It is not a pity party or anything of that nature but today in particular I am wondering where the hell I am at. I am a couple days shy of 3 weeks post surgery and have yet to regain my energy level. I am feeling exhausted which for an active person like me...it is defeating. The smallest of tasks knock the crap out of me. I know, I know don't do anything...but then what do I do with my time? I am having a hard time writing, reading makes me motion sick and TV well...that is of no interest. I am going stir crazy.

On Friday I went to have my staples out; all 43 of them. The family doctor had me come to the clinic and take them out. They came out quite nicely however my stomach had not closed properly so I have  3cm spot that won't close. He steri- stripped them and recommended that I do NOTHING and keep them dry, so no showering until he would see me again Tuesday. In the mean time the  weekend was crazy, I started to feel my right foot going cold once again, which I know when that happens I am hospital bound. Eventually I asked Pat to take me to the Emergency Department. At first he was reluctant but clearly had no problem bringing me as he knows I avoid hospitals at all costs. Once we arrived it was not long before  I was connected to IV's and was the talk of the ER. After 5 hours of being there they decided they were going to air lift me to either London or Beau Mount as there was no pulse at all in my foot. Fortunately for me the Heparin drip they started me on started to take affect and they were able to get a small faint pulse...so I got to stay right where I was. The decision was to have me go to another local hospital and have an ultrasound and angio-gram; which I did. The angio-gram was performed and I left the hospital later that day with angioplasty once again.

Back to see the family doctor about the stomach on Tuesday, which when he removed the steri-strips the stomach was still open and draining. The call to the surgeon was made and now back to London so that he could have a peek. Did I mention I am already exhausted? After he saw me he decided to just leave me well enough alone but suggested I check back in each Thursday for the next three, until my stomach closes on it's own.

I guess it is safe to say that whenever someone is on the road to recovery in any aspect of life it is difficult. Despite the efforts of everyone to cheer you or change your thoughts it is up to the individual to accept that recovery is a bitch. We can even fall off the wagon to getting better, and that is maybe where I am. I am frustrated as I wish today was next week and I am sure next week I will wish it to be next month. Either way we are never satisfied... I am a woman so this must hold true.

I am not good just laying around, never have been. I can't do a damn thing....and not even doing a damn thing is good enough. I want to dance, hang pictures, paint , drive, get groceries........stay put woman....I know I know, but HOW???? I wish I knew how to be a lazy person, and I wish  knew how to take naps not these 23 minute passouts to pass time.

Last night I went up to see my Aunt at the hospital and was quite excited about going....I even put make up on. I was exhausted just doing that but it still wasn't enough of a venture out yet. Maybe today since the sun is shining I will force my husband to take me for yet another car ride to see my geese by the water or something. One day at a time is all I keep telling myself. Even though I know I am lying to myself. So do I sound certified crazy yet? Cause I think I am....Yes I am even answering myself at times in the absence of the family being home. My little dog Sara just sighs at me when I ask her questions...it's true she does.

I know I have to work on my patience....it is not about gratitude! I have plenty of that for being saved yet again...it is just the patience piece that I am struggling with....and a bit of boredom. I am that woman in the nyquil commercial that can't sleep and is asking "what if the hokey pokey is what it is all about about"...yup that is me. Feet at the head of the bed then sideways and the opposite all in a 5 minute span. Poor Pat.

Ok I am going out .... have bugged him enough he just yelled "fine let's go"....he isn't smiling though.....Not yet anyways. Yeah I am getting out of the house, just hope I don't fall asleep during our car ride like last time! hahaha

Have a great productive day friends

Love ~Christine~

The Shoulders That Help Carry My Load..

If I were to tell you that I have been doing all of this getting better on my own; well.... I would be lying. Of course there are several people that make up Team Christine but I want to focus on one individual for this post. Yes my parents and children have gone above and beyond what would be expected but I can't tell you where I would be today...right now if it were not for my husband, best friend, soul mate ....Pat.

This poor bastard has been around for 25 years of my life. Most days I wonder why he hasn't run as far away as possible. I torture him with my constant mischief and Lucille Ball way of living. It is true. The last 10 years have been brutal on him in that he has endured a lot with respect to my illness. he never really knows if I am better or if it is just a " bump" in the road that I get better. I keep defying the odds and yet find myself with another wealth of health issues. Despite it all whether I look to my left, my right, or behind me ...he is always there. Funny I never said in front of...truth is Patrick has never walked in front of me; he is not that kind of man. He is without a doubt the man I was supposed to marry and truthfully would never hesitate in doing it again. If you were to ask him he would tell you that he would marry me every day of the week. I know this to be true because he tells me that all the time.

Our life has not been easy not one ounce of it. But like I tell my children we have had a colourful life and have managed to collect the colours and form our own rainbow....our children and our love is our pot of gold. (BTW I can't wait to show you what Ashley made for me for the hospital- next blog) Anyways Patrick decided for this surgery to take a leave from work so that he might take care of me 24 hours while in London and for when I got home. Take care of me he DID. I had no idea the level of compassion that he was able to show; especially when he had nothing else to focus on but us. No work, no emails, no phone calls.....it was like I had died and gone to heaven. Truthfully I asked him that several times at the hospital.....

He isn't always smiling, in fact he is intense and some times you are not sure what will come out of his mouth. But if you were in the hospital or needing care ....this is EXACTLY who you would want making sure you were comfortable and had all your needs met. Wow did I ever see him in action and was so very thankful for the "extra" care my nurses gave. haha mind you this same man bought them coffee, food and provided each nurse that came into my room a treat. Trust me when I tell you that they loved him and respected him for showing his love for me. In fact I think a few of the nurses were envious of us.

The first day I walked we waltzed through the hallways as if no one else was there. I sang very loudly and largely out of key ....I made up my own I am Cancer Free Song.....he just shook his head and spun me and my IV pole like I asked him to. I loved that he was the first person I saw when I woke up, because he certainly was the last person I thought of when I closed my eyes. He does not like public displays of affection...it has always been on the "divorce contract" but lately he grabs me, holds my hand and even kisses me whenever he can. No it is not because I almost died.....it is because he knows I will live and that he wants a better life as well. He has followed my journey and has realized that loving me in all the small ways I want has actually changed his life as well. What a friggen blessing.

We are one person. Have been for 25 years. We are the perfect person together; on our own we are faulted to the hilt. Somehow we have managed to fill each other in a way that we have blended to be each others strength despite our weaknesses. Where I am strong he is weak and vice versa. I know that his undying support for me has been because of this bond, and because I have spoiled this man ROTTEN! OMG he is such a baby! He has T-REX syndrome when I am not around. Don't know what that is? take your hands and put them up to your chest like a T-rex......now try to grab something........see what I mean. That is Pat. I know why he calls me Mommy....I am his mommy.

My biggest motivation to get better is so that I can get on with living the rest of my life with my Pat. For the first real time in my life I have allowed another individual to help me 100%. I am a tough, stubborn, I can do it myself person. Trust me. In the past I would have been driving by now after a major surgery; now I am still resting and letting him be there for me. He isn't so good at some things but I don't care that my beautiful $200 grey sweater jacket will now fit my nieces, or that my underwear are all blue, I don't even care that when he grocery shops he buys nothing we need. In fact I think every household should have 40 extra white bulbs. ......ok he does frustrate me a little wee bit, but I would not trade him for all the money on the earth.

He loves me AND I know it. I am so very thankful that the Lord has saved my butt yet again so that I can walk this mighty earth with my true love. This Summer I will celebrate my 23rd year of marriage, how many of us can say that today? AND still love each other.... To my partner. Thank you for loving me so much and for always making me feel like I am the only woman on the planet. xoxo

Love

~Christine~