Back to Truth Telling....

Since deciding to confess that I am “Professional Procrastinator”; I got to thinking that I might possess other flaws as well….. Paranoia set in…..I wondered; if I am aware of my flaws…how many people recognize my flaws as well?..... And what if the flaws they see are different from the ones I acknowledge……. and what if that means I have a copious amount of issues and or quirks?

I wanted to call my best friend and ask her what she thought were my flaws, but I just couldn’t. What if she was honest with me? I know I could not handle the truth, and quite frankly I would have had to end our relationship after she said anything negative about me. I thought of calling my sister ….nah, that wouldn’t work as she loves me too much to tell me. Ah Ha! I will ask my mother I thought, if anyone is going to identify my flaws AND willingly tell me, it would be her!

I phoned Mother and decided to meet with her and have a nice open honest conversation about …Me… although when I opened my mouth to ask her, the words could not be formed. My subconscious was screaming “NOOOOOOOOOO”.

The one issue that came to mind was my swearing, and how much I just love to drop the F bomb, and actually how much I love to be called a BITCH. To me there is nothing greater than to hear someone say “You are suuuuch a bitch!” Do you have any idea how pissed off the individual that is calling you a bitch must be, and to think you caused it!

F’ n A… I say!

So the thought of my swearing flaw lead me to the issue of my choice of music. I love old soul and rock and roll; but I LOVE hard core rap! You know the kind…., the music you hear and shake your head and wonder how anyone could ever listen to such crap. 

F Bombs every other word…….. That is me you hear driving down the street with the music so loud that the windows in my car are vibrating, trunk of my car is slamming open and closed as I drive….. Yeah that’s me. 

Would the real Chris Berry please stand up 

(I gave that line to Slim Shady by the way)

Then I realized that my music choice flaw was part of an even bigger flaw; one SO GINORMOUS I could write about it for days!

I would tell you about it… but then I would have to kill all of you for knowing….so I won’t.

I think my vulgarity and appreciation for hard core rap is a form of release for me. I tend to swear for good reasons, and I think most would agree. When I listen to Eminem for example; I can identify with his hatred and when I scream along to his fuck this, fuck that shit, I feel cleansed. My flaw with this? I have teenagers, and I probably shouldn’t sing along to Lil Wayne….… but it could be classified as a form of bonding right? So maybe that one is a mini flaw?

At the end of the day, accepting our flaws (even the ones we won’t admit to) as a part of who we are, our very fabric; it is a healthy choice. I know I have many flaws or character traits that frustrate the fuck (had to, sorry) out of the people I love, but I am not sure at this point in my life I can change too many things. I have addressed the big issues in my life, worked out the kinks so to speak, and now I am thinking that unless my flaws land me in a jail, or in a terrorist prison camp; I may be just fine.

My friends have chosen to stick with me after all these years and still continue to show their love and support for me, so….. If my flaws bother you, blame the people who encourage me to be me. Oh and if my flaws REALLY bother you then 

f ……………

 Go ahead and try and tell me saying that didn't just make you happy :)